Looking back at my first ever knitting project made me feel nostalgic for my craft achievements of yesteryear. So today I present a fabric collage, diligently stitched for a textiles project at school. Look at the attention to detail: the handpainted Union Jack, the belly button piercing on Scary, the stitched daisies on Baby’s dress. Truly a modern masterpiece.
Teacher Mrs Jansen, a woman permanently dressed in a shin-length floral shirt dress, didn’t agree. She examined it silently, turning it over to check the finishing at the back. ‘Out of ten…’ she sniffed, ‘…eight.’
I suppose my interpretation of the theme – water – was fairly lateral. Personally, I think it’s obvious that the Spice Girls are on stage (probably at the Brits, judging by Geri’s outfit) and the stage is flooding, causing them to exclaim in shock and dismay. I wasn’t a Spice Girls fan and would have liked to see them fail in a spectacular and damp fashion. After all, this was 1997, the year when you couldn’t go ten minutes without one of the Spicies trying to sell you a packet of crisps or roll of toilet paper.